Let's just start by clearing the air here. This ain't a 2000 word harangue on why majoring in Transgender Turtle poetry is a fucken thick as shit idea, or why yous should do this and that and this en ut, but something more, something possibly relevant. This is not a post telling you whether yous should do a masters in a STEMMIE kind of field or not. Simply put, this is a post about what exactly is going to happen to yous if you choose to dive into some of the tough shit of the STEM, abstractions built upon abstractions, balloon headed moon eyed motherfuckers still living with their parents in house with no name, with the credentials nailed to the walls, have to grow up, when, who ha, how why ken? Hell has a name, thy name is modular functions.
Fucken hell lads.
So lets get down to business en aw. I guess the main, biggie, elephant in the room and all of that is to do with the psychological aspect of being trapped in such an environment. I guess the idea of this post is to prepare a cunt for the rough and tumble of one of society's strangest, oddest environments, the inside of an office with a supervisor and his stack of paperiedoos.
But prior to this, I want you to read this post from Bodi. Ignore the "pua" tagline on his blog. It's actually an incredibly profound piece of writing, and very important in terms of what kind of people you are going to come across during your adventures in academia. We'll start with the people first, cause yous can't have smoke without fire after all.
Simply put, the more and more you advance in academia, the more and more socially incompetent people that you will come across. And just toos clarify here, I'm not talking about the shy, nerdy motherfucker who just needs a bit of confidence and a couple of jars in him, or the guy who has an unusually strong interest in rain patterns in Scandanavian countries but who be a cool dude despite this. I'm talking about the gammas, the crusty cunty crabs in the bucket. To quote bodi:
The real problem with all the Betas and Gammas is not their repellence, but the endless myriad frame-controlling attacks they see fit to attempt on anyone they feel doesn’t play their bitch games. What we essentially have is a group of men behaving like women. There is no conduct of honour or integrity in their behaviour. In short: there is no masculinity: weasely, snidey men being weasely and snidey. The closet metaphor I can construct for how I feel at work is that of a proud, majestic bear, chained in a pit, de-clawed and being slowly dragged down by small, vicious dogs darting in and out to attack. Yes: I really said proud and majestic. More Iorek Byrnison than Bungle.and
After a few weeks I suddenly realised what it is that makes chemical engineers good at chemical engineering:Bingo. We have a fucken winner. Pass go and collect $200.
a burning need to prove oneself through chemical engineering.
It was there shining out of most of my colleagues (and coincidentally the history of the entire western world)….. they actually gave a shit. They cared about this stuff and were desperate to learn that little nugget more of information to be able to get the feeling of self satisfaction from knowledge-mogging a co-worker. My problem was this:
I simply didn’t give a shit anymore.
Two years of inner-game work had moved my reference-frame to be soundly internal and I simply now don’t care what nearly all other people think. I am extremely content with myself as a person. This state of mind is in fact not condusive to doing a technical job for a living. What drives people like engineers, surgeons, pilots or computer programmers to spend years and years mastering their craft, to go home and then do more research at home on their ‘pet projects’ (as a lot do) is a deep connection between their ego and their trade. And of course a spectacular lack of pussy.
If you do a masters in a STEM, the amount of well balanced, interesting men in your vicinity are going to start dropping out like flies. What you're left with when all is said and done, is the likeable but way into it nerds, and the sickly little gamma who has his ego tied up so much with the subject, with having that little bit of an edge over the other sickly little toad man tittied bitch, that his failures in life, with women, with health, even with money, is siphoned through the fact that they are able to understand this highly esoteric topic that no one gives a fuck and a half over better than you or the lad on the stret ever will. Be wary of these people. They are trying to present an image to the world that is not them, and if yous criticize that world view in any way, you're insulting them. That's when you have trouble.
Thankfully, there's not many of these people. But, they do rise in number and in proportion, until, at apex Cathedral, the show is run by a lot of these guys and these cunts will not take no for an answer. Why do you think global warming guys are so nutty despite the fact that evidence is piling up against them, and the forecasting models like ARCH and GARCH etc are fucken useless? Why do you think doctors wrinkle their noses when a cunt mentions Gary Taubes and Robert Lustig? Why do you think a feminist will chop off your head if yous dare criticize the patriarchy? Simple as shit ken, yous are not criticizing the idea. Yous are taking them cunts for a ride and they don't like it when yous do that to them.
Which leads into point two. You are not going to win against these guys. Forget it, don't waste your breath. You are not going to win against a guy who is passionate about the subject, or has his ego tied up so much with the subject so as far as being Freddy the fucking fantastic neurosurgeon . Do your best yes of course ken, take pride in what you're doing, the best job a cunt can do and all that shebang, all out or fuck off home. But tread lightly my brothers, yous are on a sinking ship and there's no fucken lifeboat. You're fucked boy. Fucked.
The pussy, well that's a problem too. Not only are the lassies (all that sexism, sigh) thin on the ground (and usually fat in de head, ho ho ho), letting one of these nerdy, witchly, quiet, introverted, mostly chinese lassies into a pit full of slobbering nerds means that all hell can break loose. That, my friends is where shit can get pretty damn ugly. Suddenly going drinking stops being fun because it turns into a gossip queen circle jerk where we try and put down the other lad. Then we try and seduce a lassie by taking to her about Fermat's last theorem and conjectures by two nutty Japanese lads. But they don't go home with her. THEY GO HOME WITH FUCKEN DAMO AND IT BLOWS THEIR FUCKEN SKULLS KEN!!!
Watch your drinking ken. Again, I fucked up here. Franco goes full blown manosphere after a few scoops. Results are interesting, but ultimately messy, something yous have to reel in on.
You're going to find it hard to get laid in a masters, due to the level of work required for the course, the poor quality of lassie and the lack of free time to say approach, the sleep deprivation (in my case full blown insomnia) or even expand a social circle. In short, the thing can turn into a weird cat and mouse game where you're trying to play yourself off as balanced, not to make a cunt jealous but not to be "weird". This is something I've failed to do. Hopefully yous won't make the same mistake that I did in that regard.
If there's pussy in your class, it's either nursing or you've found yourself in Comparative Literature. In which case, get the fuck out ken! Now like! So do nursing ken.
Part Two gets all Sartre on your arses.